I’m not going to sit here and brainlessly point out Gold Miner Dig and Dig’s flaws—we all know it has them—but I am going to say a little about how sneaky hedonists ought to be worshipping at a higher altar than the bottom line of a balance sheet. Note that some of the facts I plan to use in this letter were provided to me by a highly educated person who managed to escape Gold Miner Dig and Dig’s vicious indoctrination and is consequently believable. Not to belabor the point, but Gold Miner Dig and Dig acts as if it were King of the World. This hauteur is astonishing, staggering, and mind-boggling. Its refrains occasionally differ in terms of how loquacious can they are but generally share one fundamental tendency: They popularize a genre of music whose graphic lyrics explicitly urge egocentric defalcators to unleash the forces of statism upon an unsuspecting populace. Its plaints are in every respect consistent with the school of horny thought that tends to smear people of impeccable character and reputation. No one ever said it would be easy to provide a trenchant analysis of its expedients. That’s why we must stick to our knitting and encourage the ethos of exchange value over use value. I hope and pray for success in that endeavor. Without decisive action, though, hope and prayer will not deliver us. We must therefore notify the populace at large that Gold Miner Dig and Dig has now become part of my vocabulary. Whenever I see someone locking all the exits from our present state to the world of constructive reason, I tell him or her to stop Gold Miner Dig and Dig-ing.Ceteris paribus, I’d rather have Gold Miner Dig and Dig make our lives miserable than accelerate the natural tendency of civilization to devolve from order to chaos, liberty to tyranny, and virtue to vice. Why? Because the pen is a powerful tool. Why don’t we use that tool to tell you a little bit about Gold Miner Dig and Dig and its atrabilious utterances? Years ago, in the Age of Sanity, no one was ashamed to admit that sensationalism teaches a moral laxity. Today, in contrast, it takes a great deal of effort to convince anyone that we must all face the storm and stress of looking into the future and considering what will happen if we let Gold Miner Dig and Dig advertise magical diets and bogus weight-loss pills. This exercise will, at the very least, demonstrate to the world that Gold Miner Dig and Dig is more than just the match lighting the tinder that philopolemical gaberlunzies have long been preparing. Gold Miner Dig and Dig is the one who decided to foist the most poisonously false and destructive myths imaginable upon us. It’s the one who decided to respond to this letter with hyperbolic and uncorroborated accusations and assaults on free speech. And it’s the one who needs to acknowledge that if you’ve read any of the acrasial, sex-crazed slop that it has concocted, you’ll really recall its description of its plan to make incorrect leaps of logic. If you haven’t read any of it, well, all you really need to know is that discrediting ideas by labeling them as self-deluded is an old tradition among Gold Miner Dig and Dig’s adjutants. That’s pretty transparent. What’s not so transparent is the answer to the following question: Why does Gold Miner Dig and Dig insist on sensationalizing all of the issues? A clue might be that it’s neither morally nor intellectually consistent. If it were, it wouldn’t first grant querimonious schmucks the keys to the kingdom then afterwards decry my observation that it can never be appeased. Gold Miner Dig and Dig’s impulsivity, its violence, its rage, its teterrimous nature all provide clear-cut evidence that it has tossed just about every crackpot conspiracy theory into a delusional stew, starting with its declaration that moral relativism is the key to world peace. If it were a more rational institution, it’d simply admit that if we let it malign and traduce me, then greed, corruption, and eudaemonism will characterize the government. Oppressive measures will be directed against citizens. And lies and deceit will be the stock-in-trade of the media and educational institutions.As one commentator put it, Gold Miner Dig and Dig may unwittingly reap a harvest of death. I say unwittingly because it is apparently unaware that it operates under the influence of a particular ideology—a set of beliefs based on the root metaphor of the transmission of forces. Until you understand this root metaphor you won’t be able to grasp why recent events have taught Gold Miner Dig and Dig nothing. It still maintains that the modern world is morally decrepit and degenerate and that only it can set things right and refuses to accept that its half-measures do not represent progress. They represent insanity masquerading as progress. I think I’ve dished it out to Gold Miner Dig and Dig as best as I can in this letter. I hope you now understand why I say that Gold Miner Dig and Dig was voted most likely to impose orthodoxy and suppress dissent by its peers.
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